Why making Decisions based on facts are good but other’s feelings are bad

So many of us live our lives with a desire to do so with compassion and sensitivity.  There is nothing wrong with that except for when it comes to making decisions or choices in your life.  We carefully plan our decisions or choices in order not to be seen as selfish, arrogant or rude toward another human being.  We carefully step in order never to offend another and in doing so, we wonder why much of our life is spent wondering why things do not work out well for us.  Our first thought is to blame God for the direction our lives may be headed and if that doesn’t work we tend to then blame anyone and everyone else because we cannot figure out how a caring, loving person, such as ourselves, could end up in so much mess.  The problem is, we fail to consider that the reason our lives are in so much of a mess is we fail to honor that simple phrase given to us by Jesus Christ himself when he says that before you attempt to help your brother remove the splinter from his eye, you must first remove the beam from your own.  We refuse to heed these words because to some, this sounds a little selfish and Lord knows we don’t want to be selfish but what if I told you that keeping to what Jesus said is not selfish as long as we prevent ourselves from crossing over into enemy territory by avoiding the excessiveness that often closely follows and an all actions.  Consider this, could evil have set this thing up so following Jesus’ words seem selfish to prevent us from ever discovering just how much more enjoyable and stress free this life could be if we followed it.  Here’s an example.

You try to figure a way to explain to your child why they cannot have that new toy similar to the new toy that the neighbor’s child has because you just don’t have the money to buy it.  You know this information may make them mad and it could have them hating you.  With this thought, you now look for ways to find the money to get that child this toy and find yourself willing to do almost anything to accomplish this goal.  You justify your willingness by saying and convincing yourself just how much your child means to you and to display proper love for this child, you must be willing to do whatever to make and keep them happy.  You are now attempting to help your brother remove a splinter while you are still having trouble seeing because of your beam and you are now a fool.  Why a fool?  You can’t be a fool if you love your children enough right?  Wrong, you can and in this case as like all other cases similar to it, you are.

You are because this and all situations similar can be fixed so easy and the decision or choice you make can be so simple that it blows my mind how difficult we make these things.  What do you think your child cares for more, that toy or you?  If you say the toy then you are surely blind and need to remove that beam or move it a little to either side so you can see a little bit clearer.  That child loves you more and if you were to honestly take a few minutes and tell the child exactly what you are facing, that child will see your position better because that splinter will be gone and that child will be prepared for disappointment to the point where you may even remark just how well he/she dealt with it.  By allowing that child to see your faults, fears and weaknesses, you are truly giving them the best lessons that they will ever learn in life because to a child, no other hero stands as tall, jumps as high and soars as well as their parents.  To see you as being human help them to understand that it is okay to be human.  Nothing harms a child more than to have them thinking that they are steel and can never be hurt or harmed because when it does happen, that child will then look to you to explain and if you have a hard time explaining things to them as a child, imagine how difficult it is going to be trying to explain things to them as an adult. 

Bottom line when it comes to making decisions or choices, choose based on all of the facts that you know at that time and base it on how you feel at that time.  Never try to consider what others will say or how others will feel because you have no say nor control over that and to tie a decision or choice to something you have no control over is clearly the act of a fool.  You said you weren’t a fool so now can we safely say that now when it comes to making decisions or choices, facts are what you need, your feelings are most required and everything else is just noise?


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